The
Repopulation Project
I am used to the sounds of my solitude. These noises
are as dear to me as the air that I breathe. The rhythmic crackle and crunch of
the ice beneath my feet is a song that only someone submerged in the silence of
this place could hear. The wind whistling through the trees is the pipe
section. The branches as they whip against each other a slow steady rattle and
hiss. This is the orchestra of my life. This is all I have to smile about but
sadly not all I can remember. Sometimes I wish I had no recollection of what
remains lacking. I glance down at the
contrast between the red of my boots and the plethora of white. These boots will be the end of me.
The sun
begins its ominous descent behind the mountains in the distance. Soon the isolation of the night would be upon
me. I start to run towards my shelter.
The brilliant colors fluid in their movement as they blend to surround the
descending light. This always makes me feel a sense of urgency. I need to be safe in my shelter, deep beneath
the powdery white. My breath a moist morse code signal into the icy sky above
me as my mind repeats the words Do not
see me...Do not see me. The open space before my refuge is where I feel
most vulnerable. I fight the urge to fall to my knees and say a prayer as I come
closer to my solitude. The last moments of fresh air and space are bitter
sweet. My snowsuit is white. I blend with the surroundings, except for me feet.
My boots they are blood red in an ocean of white. I can’t help but wonder what
moron outfitted the crew with them. My boots were so small back then. I am
wearing now what my mother had been wearing when we came to this place.
Go back to earth they said. Earth is now habitable
they said. A foolish few of us dared to believe
and came home.
Most of what was left of the human race had been
evacuated from the planet earth in the year 7511. Prior to the comets, complete
cleansing of the planet. This did not finish the human race for we had already
found a way to safety...Sort of. The earth’s inhabitants left in massive cargo
ships like the Noah’s ark of old. The rich were kings and queens. The poor well...
We became breeding stock. There would be no difference between us and the other
animals saved from extinction. Well little to no difference. The animals of old
were stored as embryos, cryogenically frozen. The real animals were left to perish in the
blast or in the cold that was sure to follow. Humans were the only things grown
to adulthood. We were cultivated as a crop. The poor were grateful to be taken along. They
did not dare complain about the reason why. My ancestors became breeders
created to repopulate a planet we had never laid foot on. An orb of white that
one day we would return to. A symbol of our future freedom that was visible
from the viewing area.
I
was born on a cargo ship as was my mother and her
mother before her. The smiles of the female members of my family were
the only
visions of grandeur I had ever seen. I had no toys. We had no
possessions. We
floated in a metal room with nothing but each other. Our numbers grew as
each of
my female family members had their eggs harvested. They would be used to
create
a life with an unknown males essence. Most of the embryos were stored
for the
repopulation project. My siblings remain even now in a cryogenically
frozen
embryonic state...somewhere. Every once in a while they would develop a
few to term.
They grew a perfected form of humanity. We were now free of every
genetic
defect. A woman who had ceased her ability to procreate was left to
raise the children.
The men were put to proper use in other areas of the cargo ship. There
were no standard families anymore. All male children were put to work
at the age
of ten. They were separated from the female community before they had a
chance
to achieve puberty. Heaven forbid a child was made the old fashioned
way. I was
only five when they offered up freedom to a chosen few family units. It
is
strange that I remember that place as clearly as I do.
My mother, two of my aunts, and I were in one of the
first settlement groups. A group of five men were sent with us. We took
shuttles to earth. The ships would
double as our dwellings upon arrival. The shuttles contained small groups. No
more than ten passengers were allowed onboard. We would establish settlements on
the finally habitable planet of our ancestors.
I remember the light exploding around us. A beacon of faith as we descended into the earths
atmosphere. There had not even been the briefest moment of panic as we landed
on the white planet. We were sent well equipped for the arctic weather of the
North. In the South, we were told that we were destined to find a warmer
climate. They suggested we stay in the frozen safety of the North. Anything that would have survived would have
attempted the pilgrimage south long ago. We
would be safe here in the North. They had been wrong about so many things.
I spend a large portion of my time talking to
myself. I am an ageless girl all alone
in a vessel hidden deep beneath a snow drift on a frozen planet.
How did that happen? Well...I’m not entirely alone.
I have the bodies of my family and crew quite frozen solid in a safe place, as
twisted as that sounds. Had I not been smart enough to keep them as a child, I
would have nothing to wear right now. I would have frozen to death a long time
ago. That is how I ended up with these hideous boots. I think they made them
red so we could find each other in the vast expanse of white. Instead, they
helped everything unsavory find us. Now I am not complaining. I have survived
another day. That is always something to be thankful for. I say the little prayer that my mother taught
me shortly before she came to live in my freezer.
The sounds they cannot hurt you
Lay safe and still
my sweet.
No noise you
make
Shallow
breaths you must take
Until you
fall asleep.
Dream of
nothing sad, good times not bad.
Until once
again we meet.
I was warned
against making a fire. I have never had the urge to make one because I never
get cold. The others were always cold when they were alive. It is ironic that
even in death they are freezing. The vessel is covered in snow giving an igloo
like effect. It is possible that is what makes the temperature tolerable for
me. Each and every morning as part of my routine I go outside and pack more
snow around the craft. It must be five feet of solid ice by now. The last thing
that crosses my mind every single night as I close my eyes is... Did I remember
to lock the door? I know that it has to
be opened by human D.N.A., but that doesn’t matter. I not only push on it, I shove
things through it and in front of it. That cold ridged metal door is the only proof
that I am in here. This place deep in the side of a mountain is both my solace
and my prison.
I whisper the prayer my mother taught me one more
time for luck. I lie on my bunk and shut my eyes tightly as the shrieking sounds
of the night begin. At first it’s far off in the distance, and then it’s close.
Until they begin to pant, and scratch on the door. I like to pretend that I’m
invisible that even if they found a way inside they would not see me. I imagine
I blend right into the metal bunk. I fantasise I am a part of it. I am one with
the ship that protects me. I start my deep calming breathing. I was to take forty
deep slow cleansing breaths. I inhale the first one and count to ten then
slowly exhale. I count to ten again. By the time, I get halfway done I am
almost there, melting into my bunk. I am the liquid form of my being. I slip inside
of myself until I am adrift on the endless stream of my subconscious.
I wake up every morning and brush my teeth. I open
the door and spit the foam from the tube into the snow outside. I count the
prints in the snow. I comb my hair with my fingers. I put the flash drive of whatever knowledge I
seek into the main frame. I do my schooling by hologram. There are so many
lessons. I have listened to them all so many times. I repeat them aloud and mimic
the hologram when I’m bored. I watch movies
so I can learn to interact with other people.
The radio on this ship had never worked when it had counted.
I hear some random voices from time to
time. They say things like, “Please help us.”
I answer them
in my head Sorry it is just me. You will have
to help yourself. I know the voices
cannot be trusted. I think this was part of the plan. They would send us here, cut
us off, and watch to see if we survive. Sometimes I wonder if someone somewhere
is watching me. I hope they are thoroughly entertained by my misery. The
scratching on the door used to scare me to death as a child. Now it just feels
like a timer, it means it’s my bedtime. The nails will click away until they
finally find a way to get inside. One day they will add me to the bodies in the
freezer. I understand this. I cannot keep them out forever. What am I thinking?
There is nobody left to put my body in the freezer. I will be gone. Another day
is done. I say my prayer.
The sounds they cannot hurt you
Lay safe and still
my sweet.
No noise you make
Shallow
breaths you must take
Until you fall asleep.
Dream of nothing sad, good times not bad.
Until once
again we meet.
Thuds, bangs, scratches, and a continuous clicking
sound lull me to sleep. I start my breathing and slip into nothing.
I was far too
young when the adults died to keep track of time. I haven’t the foggiest idea
how old I am. I have a chest and hips now. I am not quite as shapely as my mother.
I try to see myself in the reflective surfaces, but the image is all wavy and
distorted.
At some point every single day I try and have a
visit with my mother. I pretend that she is sleeping. It actually isn’t nearly as
creepy as it sounds. I spend time with her by having one sided conversations. When
I need to hear her voice, I watch her hologram diaries. When I hear her voice
speaking, I pretend it’s only to me.
My
Mother’s hologram diaries
Week one:
My name is Nylan 110. I am with one of the first
crews on the mission to repopulate the planet earth. I am here with my sisters,
one of my daughters, and some men from aboard The Cargo ship Savior. I have faith in this new life. Earth is
healing, and I feel honored to be a part of this mission. We have been going
out only in the sunlight for we have heard the sounds of wild animals at night.
We have set up some traps to catch one so we can see what we are dealing with.
The snow is an endless supply of fresh water. We have begun to eat it finding
it is filling as well and a pleasant change to the tube food we were sent with.
We have yet to find any edible wildlife in the daylight hours. Once we have
discovered what kind of predators we are dealing with, then we will know if it
is safe to hunt at night.
Week two:
My name is Nylan 110. I am with one of the first
crews on the mission to repopulate the planet earth. I am here with my sisters,
one of my daughters, and some men from aboard The Cargo ship Savior. We have
discovered that there are other intelligent life forms that have survived in
the northern regions where we had assumed that we would be alone. We were wrong
of course. We caught one of the creatures and took it aboard to study. It seems
almost human. They haven’t let me near it. Everything inside of me is screaming
that we need to get this being off of the ship. I wish to god I had not brought
Nylan 112 with me. I fear for her safety now. I just could not bare to leave her
behind. There are many of these creatures outside. How can we possibly coexist in
this place?
Week three:
My name is Nylan 110. I am with one of the first
crews on the mission to repopulate the planet earth. I am here with my sisters,
one of my daughters, and some men from aboard The Cargo ship Savior.
I suspect the team travelling with us was not picked
at random. I have overheard some distressing conversations. This being aboard
the ship has characteristics from several ancient arctic species mixed with
human D.N.A.
Could they have been bred aboard the Savior, placed
here with us on purpose? Could this be a test? The team sent with us says this creature
could not have occurred through natural evolution. I am beginning to suspect
someone is playing god. We were forced to set him free in the daylight for at
night it seemed there were dozens of them who had found our ship they were
pounding on it and tipping in at making the most terrifying sounds. He ran
about fifty feet or so and then died. When he died he liquefied before we could
hide the body. We attempted to cover up the evidence. Nothing could cover that
smell it was as though his essence stained the planet. Marking the scene of his
death and pointing the guilty finger directly at us. It will look to his kind
like we killed him on purpose. One can only imagine what they will do come
nightfall.
We
covered
the ship in snow, layer upon layer until the sun set. My daughter told
me someone was coming. She can sense the danger we are in for
accidentally killing one of their own.
I made up a little prayer with my daughter in hopes
that god may be listening. I hope he doesn’t find us at fault for what our
people have created. I pray for nothing myself but her safety and her ability
to survive without me if something should happen.
Week four:
My name is Nylan 110. I am with one of the first
crews on the mission to repopulate the planet earth. I was here with my sisters,
one of my daughters, and some men from aboard The Cargo ship Savior. The
creatures came at us with a vengeance taking us in broad daylight from
underneath the snow as we attempted to search for sustenance. My sisters are dead and almost all of the
crew. Their bodies were left in a line in front of the door. We have stored the
bodies in the freezer. On each corpse,
nothing but a tiny mark, all but invisible to the naked eye. On each victim, it seemed to go directly into
the spinal column.
Captain Dillon says he’s just a grunt. He can operate
the ship and fight. He knows nothing of science. He says he has called for
help. I have a feeling that nobody is coming. Three of us remain. Captain Dillon, my brave little girl, and I. Thank
goodness there is a staggering amount of tube nourishment in the cargo hold. We cannot leave the ship. We are trapped...There
is no freedom for any of us here on earth.
My mother would leave no more entries after that one.
One night she heard the voice of a child. It was crying and pleading with her
to open the door. She couldn’t help herself, and in the time it took to exhale
she was gone. Captain Dillon shut the door quickly and held me down until
morning when he opened the door, and her body had been left in front of it. We
took her inside and placed her in the freezer with the rest of the crew. He
then began teaching me how to survive and what the rules would be if anything
were to happen to him. He stayed with me for quite a while. I was alone with
him for a year or two. I have no concept of time. We assumed other ships had
landed because the creatures had left us alone. We hadn’t heard a scratch or squeal
in months.
That morning we had the first contact on the radio. The
voice said they were our evacuation crew. They had landed less than a mile from
our vessel. Captain Dillon told me he would be right back with some help. I knew
he was gone forever as the door slid shut behind him. He was not left outside
of the ship as the others were. Captain Dillon is not the freezer.
No more voices came on the radio. I was alone with
nothing but holograms and lessons. I had nothing but the bodies in the freezer
to talk to. One day I just knew that I
was safe. Perhaps I had just ceased to care. I felt safety in the daylight hours.
I ate snow every day and went for a walk. I always sensed that something was nearby,
but nothing had ever made its presence known.
One day I began to bleed. I thought I was dying. It
was that night that the sounds came back. I found information and supplies for my
condition onboard. I stay indoors for a
week every month. After my issue is gone, the sounds disappear again. I venture
out once again to eat some snow and get some fresh air.
I have never seen another living creature
during the daylight hours. I suspect the small animals that live here are
nocturnal. I can faintly hear the pitter patter of their tiny hearts through
the veil of silence that encompasses me. I rest my hand against a tree for a moment. I always
end up filling my grumbling stomach with snow. There is still food on board the
ship, but on some days, I would rather starve than eat veggie paste. I have even
eaten bark over veggie paste. I struggle
to screw the cap off and begin to squeeze the thick vile fluid between my lips.
A voice... I can hear a voice. I put it down
and listen.
The radio squeals. A male voice says, “Is anybody
out there?”
I never answer only privately in my mind. It has
been so long since I have talked to another person. I pick up the radio and touch
the red button. It makes a screeching sound. The voice on the other end says,”
I hear you... I heard that. Please try again.”
I press it again, and it screeches. I laugh aloud at
the sound it makes.
The voice says,” There is someone out there. I can hear
you.” The man begins to cry.
I drop the radio in a panic. I promised to follow
the rules. I promised I would never let anyone else onboard. Even if they said
they were friendly. That is how my mother was fooled into going outside. I
promised Captain Dillon. I promised I would survive. I could not let anyone in because
it may be a trick. They will take my
food. They will take my shelter. They will hurt me. I remember his final warning
as clear as day.
I can’t help myself. I press the button, and it
screeches again. I need to hear the voice now. I need to know if it will still cry.
I don’t cry anymore even when I watch people cry on movies. The act of crying
intrigues me.
I hear laughter. I hear joy. I want to let him know
someone is out there. What will it hurt to say one word?
I pick up the radio press the button, and I say,
“Hello.”
I am greeted with laughter, a crazy amount of
laughter. The voice says, “Oh thank god.”
I press it and smile. I remember the person on the
other end can’t see my smile. So I press it again and say, “I am here.”
My soul began to cheer. I have finally spoken to
someone, and they have answered me back.
I hear the
shrieking begin outside. I whisper,” Be
quiet now, no fire, no lights, block the door. Don’t let anyone in. No matter
what they say even if it’s a child.”
“Until we speak again,” the voice whispers to me.
My stomach
feels funny. I smile so wide my cheeks begin to hurt. I convince myself to start
my deep breathing. I pretend this night is the same as any other. I succumb to
the nothing.
I dream for the first time in a long time. I can’t
think of a man as anything but protection or danger because the last time I saw
my reflection I was a child. I jump off of the bunk in the morning and kneel in
front of the radio. I wonder, Will I will
ever hear his voice again? Did he survive the night? Will he speak
again? Will he cry? Will he laugh?
I hear his voice say, “Are you there?”
I press the button and answer,” Yes... I am still
here.”
The voice responds, “My name his Michael.”
I reply my name is Nylan. I give him my family name,
and leave my crop number off.
“How old are you Nylan?” Michael asks.
I tell the truth,” I don’t know.”
He says, “I have been here maybe a month. I came
with a supply ship. Have you had some
kind of head trauma?”
I press the button and answer,” I am healthy.”
There is a long drawn out moment of silence. He says,
“I suspect you have been alone for a long time.”
I’m not
supposed to say that I’m alone. I
realise this person has no way to find me. He would be dead once darkness came
if he made an attempt to. I reply, “Yes.”
“We should
try to find each other, “The voice states.
“We will die,
“I state as a fact. I realize I am being blunt,
but there is no point in sugar coating the situation for this human.
He replies,
“We have to at least try...Don’t we? Do you want to be alone forever?”
His words
struck a chord in my soul. The creatures haven’t killed me. They let me out in
the day. What is the difference between tempting fate for no reason and
tempting fate with purpose?
I say, “Okay...I
will come to you,” and the story begins.
I can not wait for this one. Are you writing the whole book? I want to know what happens.
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